“All
the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players, they have their exits
and entrances”, so began the play ‘I don’t like it: As you like it’ in Prithvi
theatre, Mumbai. The play, directed by Rajat Kapoor, had various instances that
made the audience look back and introspect at life and moments that made the
audience think about what one actually wants in life, but for me the defining
moment had to be the initial sentence of the play, taken from the very popular
monologue from the play ‘As you like it’ by William Shakespeare. It triggered off
myriad thoughts in my mind, thoughts of life, of people who came into my life
at various stages, and most importantly of the ones that left. It got me
thinking, “Isn’t life just a long series of events interspersed with chance
encounters and farewells?”
It’s
strange how it takes just a “Hi” to start relationships, but it takes more than
a “Goodbye” to end them. I wonder, if it’s a given that people who come into your
life are bound to leave at some point of time or the other, then why is it that
every farewell is laden with tears, why is it that when some people leave, they
leave tugging at ones heartstrings?
When
I look back at life, I realize that I have had a fair share of teary farewells
in my life, while some people left with a promise to stay in touch, some
left without any such assurance and some left forever, but with an unspoken promise
to meet in another world, perhaps. As much as I hated the thought of farewells,
life kept taking me places and I found myself saying more Goodbye's than Hi's all
the time. Off-late my life has been about very short encounters and abrupt
farewells, by now I feel I should have gotten used to saying “Good bye”,
however each farewell leaves me teary-eyed and down. Then again life happens
and the daily trials and tribulations of life fills up the voids created by farewells and life
goes on as usual, but nothing, not even time can take away completely the memories of people dear to us, can they?
I
always believed that I had built this invisible wall around myself, the entry into which was restricted only to those who were
very close to me. It was in my opinion, a measure to protect myself from the
misery of a broken trust or a relationship gone sour. However with time, I
realized that the walls had begun to crumble and I had let in more people than I had intended to and when
anyone left, it hurt. The irony of it all is that, if saying that
initial “Hi” to that person was difficult, saying “Goodbye” was even more
difficult.
Recently I was reading the novel ‘Guide’ by R.K.Narayan. There is a
character Joseph in the novel who tells the protagonist of the
novel Raju that he only does his duty of providing his guests with all that they
require during their stay at his place, unconcerned about their blame or praise. If we were to look at our
lives this way it makes sense, because aren’t we also like Joseph for the guests who are the people who come into our lives. If we consider the
people who come into our lives as guests, our aim should be to give our best to them,
be it our time, our support or our love and affection, but not to expect
anything back in return, and not to get attached to them. In that way, we can protect ourselves from the pain of them not
sharing the same feelings that we have for them, or them leaving us. A lot of
people come into our lives, while some give us memories of a lifetime, some give us
not so pleasant ones, while some help us become better human beings, some give us a
chance to help them become better human beings, but in the end once their role
in our life is over, they leave, sometimes with a promise to return, sometimes
forever. It is only when we get attached to them, it brings us misery. All that
I have read and understood from books by great minds, all that I have learnt from my experience, tells me to not
get attached to people or places, however in the battle between the head and the heart, seldom does the head win.
It is
an ideal condition to wish for, one where someone is totally detached and devoid of
attachment to anyone, but I am not sure how one can attain that state or if it
can ever be attained. Until then, let the cycle of encounters and farewells continue,
let me still shed tears at every farewell, but let me be able to tell everyone
who came into my life, “Yes, I will miss you” from the bottom of my heart, let me be able to tell them that I have tried
to make their life better in every way possible, but may have failed at times
and for which I am extremely sorry; let me be able to tell them that I am thankful
for all the memories, bitter or sweet, that they have given me and that I will cherish them always, and
that this farewell is but a short hiatus till we meet again sometime, in this life or another.
