365 Days of Valentine's

Off-late I have taken an aversion to news in any form, be it newspapers, TV news channels or the latest to join the bandwagon - 'social media'. There was a time when I used to begin my day with the newspaper in one hand and a cup of hot tea in the other, going through all the articles, with great interest. Nowadays the very thought of beginning a day with the newspaper dreads me, what with news about violence - murders, crimes, assaults; news about conflicts - between nations, between states, between political parties; news about death - due to accidents, diseases and so on filling up almost all pages of the newspaper. I could avoid all news totally and stay undisturbed by the sad state of affairs of the world around me, but I know it won't be long till the bubble burst. There is no point in denying that we live in very difficult times, the sooner we accept it, the better it is to come to terms with reality.

There are times, when I wish I could just travel back in time some 20 years; life as I knew it then was so peaceful and devoid of complexities. I sometimes wonder as to what has changed over all these years - is it me or is it the world around me, or both? Every day, back then, was a celebration - of life, of love, of togetherness. Cut to some 20 years later, every day feels like a war. It is like you are fighting a battle for existence every day; you consider yourselves lucky if you get back home, safe and sound at the end of the day.

The daily battle begins from the moment we wake up. Suppose you woke up late one day and are running late for office, or your breakfast is not ready on time, or you are not able to find your dress or your vehicle's keys, everyone who comes your way that day has to face your wrath. The first victims of the battle - your family. Quarrels, arguments ensue and somehow you manage to step out of home. The next part of the battle begins; the battleground is the road, and the victims - everyone who is on the road. Pedestrians blame the people on bikes, people on bikes blame people who ride cars; people who ride cars, blame people who ride buses, and the bus drivers - they blame other bus drivers, car drivers, bike riders, pedestrians, and basically anyone who dares come in their way! The battle gets ugly at traffic signals, where the moment the signal goes from red to green, there is this mad rush of vehicles to get past the signal (as if it were a matter of life or death!) and the honking and cursing the drivers of the vehicles in front as if they were going to stay there for eternity. In the hurry to reach their destinations, people conveniently turn a blind eye to traffic rules and often to other people on the road. Navigating their way through the crazy crowd, when one finally manages to reach office, a different kind of enemy awaits them there! The battlefield is office and the victims, well every one in the office. 

If "Survival of the fittest" was what Charles Darwin said about natural selection, it is "Survival of the smartest" that works at the workplace. Each day in a highly competitive workplace is a battle to outsmart the smartest. Add tight schedules, deadlines, targets, reviews, dynamic business situations and peer pressure to a day and getting through the day seems nothing less than fighting a war. After a tiring day at office, when you ride back home, the second part of the battle on road begins. You get back home, and the second part of the battle at home begins. This goes on until you go to sleep. It's the same old story, the next day, the battle goes on and on.

If one were to do a root cause analysis of what has changed over the years, I feel that the root cause would be the lack of love - love for oneself and love for the people around ourselves. Somewhere in this fast paced life of ours, we have forgot this simple yet powerful feeling that is love. From childhood, we are taught that the mantra for surviving in this world is "Compete or die". Children are not taught to love each other or help others in need, instead they are taught how to get good grades in exams. Of what use is a good grade or all the education in the world to a person who does not use it for the good of the people around him! In our effort to make children toppers and rank holders, we forget to teach them lessons in humanity. 

All we need today to make our lives better is a little bit of love - love for ourselves and our family, love for all the people on the road, love for all the colleagues at work, basically love for everyone around us. A little bit of love for your family will go a long way in avoiding those battles at home. You show a little bit of love and consideration for the people and other vehicles on the road, and our roads would not be deadly battlegrounds any more. Reaching your destination late will not hurt as much as the remorse of having hurt someone in the process of reaching your destination. If you keep aside all the thoughts of competition from your mind, you might actually start appreciating your colleagues more and start liking your work more. Learn to love yourself and take good care of yourself, because unless you love yourself you cannot love anyone else. 

The key to making this world a better place lies in this famous quote by Auden - "Love each other or perish". Each day of our life should be a celebration of love. All we need is 365 days of Valentine's.

Joy On Four Wheels

I remember my first lesson in marketing - "Marketing is all about identifying customer's needs", said my professor. "Successful are those companies who can identify their customer's needs and create products that can satisfy those needs." Well, it looks like car manufacturer Maruti-Suzuki has got its marketing absolutely perfect, when it comes to the new Alto K10, which it launched in the month of November, 2014. The model's automatic variant, is like a dream-come-true for the common man who wanted the 'ease of driving' that an automatic offered, but who thought that automatics were way out of his league because of the heavy price-tags attached to them. The new Alto K10 is by far the lowest priced automatic car in India. 

Gone are the days when a middle-class Indian family could only dream of owning an automatic car. Owning an automatic car for well within Rs. 5L, is now a reality, thanks to India's most loved car manufacturer - Maruti-Suzuki and the latest offering in its K10 series. The new Alto K10 is the long awaited answer to the prayers of several Indians - ranging from youngsters to adults to senior citizens, who had difficulty in driving a manual car, but who could not afford an automatic one. Be it beginners who are not very comfortable with the whole clutch-and-gear scheme of things, or ladies who have trouble parking their cars, or senior citizens who feel tired after all that gear-changing during a drive, everyone would simply love driving the new Alto K10 automatic. It is the perfect car for beginners, ladies and senior citizens, as it very easy to drive around. The car is a boon for office-goers in the city; it does not wear you out like a manual does in the stop-start traffic with the frequent gear-shifting. Now this is one car that would make one feel good even while one is stuck in traffic :-) Driving in traffic could not get easier than this! 

The new Alto K10 would get to you even before you hop on to the driver's seat. The car has "cute" written all over it - be it the swept-back headlamps, or the grill with the "S" logo, or the beautifully designed "K10" sign at the rear, everything adds a touch of beauty to the car. It is undoubtedly one of the most good-looking cars in its segment. The interiors of the car are also very attractive, courtesy the dual-tone finish and a very pretty instrument cluster, which gives the interiors a very up-market feel. There is plenty of leg space in the front and it is not bad at the rear either, with the scooped front seats offering much more leg space for the rear passengers than can be found in the car's old variants. The cabin is very airy and the dual-tone colors make the cabin look very bright and lively. One would definitely not mind a long-drive on this one for sure!

Picture courtesy: Official Facebook page of Alto K10

Looks and ease-of-driving apart, if there is one thing that would endear the car to the price-conscious Indian, it would be the car's fuel efficiency. Unlike other automatic cars, this small wonder from the Maruti-Suzuki stable does not burn a hole in your pocket. It is high on fuel-efficiency and will definitely have you taking your car out more often. 

It has only been a couple of months since a new Alto K10 automatic became a part of our motor-vehicle family, and it has already conquered the hearts of everyone in my family. It has also become my father's new-found-love. Earlier, we used to go for outings only occasionally, and when we did, we used to go late in the night, to avoid the city-traffic in the evenings; but not anymore. With the new Alto K10 coming into our lives, things have changed; we go out more often and we do not postpone outings to late nights, driving through traffic is no longer a concern for us. We even made a long-distance trip in our car, and we enjoyed the ride thoroughly. My father just loves driving the car and he is always ready to go driving in the car at the drop of a hat. Of-late, I have had some of the best times with my family during these rides in our new car. The tagline of the car says "Chase Life", which I feel is perfect for the car. Life is beautiful and we need to make sure that we do not miss any moment of it, especially the moments that we spend with the people who mean the world to us, like our family and friends. Our new Alto K10 has been a part of some of the best moments of our lives. It has helped my father, who is a senior citizen, overcome his fear of driving and chase those pleasures of life, which he never thought he could enjoy, like driving from one city to another and back all on his own, driving through the old roads in the neighborhood where he grew up, where he used to walk to go to his school, or driving comfortably through rush-hour traffic. It has helped me and my parents chase that joy of a quality time together, while enjoying the sites and the sounds of the city that all of three of us love - the city of Cochin. It has helped us chase the small joys in life, like sitting in the beach at Fort Kochi and watching the sun slowly set in the horizon, and having dinner at our favorite restaurant in the city, and seeing the Christmas festivities in Fort Kochi at night. 

Thank you Maruti-Suzuki for having understood the needs of the Indian consumer all these years and thank you for giving us the likes of the 800, the Zen, the Alto, and the latest Alto K10. You have given us a wonderful car in the new Alto K10. If I were to describe the latest addition to the K10 family in four words, this is how I would put it - "Joy On Four Wheels".  

    

Once Upon A Time in Thrissur - Part I

Year 2015 is here. As I say goodbye to the year 2014, it’s also time for me to bid farewell to a city that had been my home for the past one and a half years - Thrissur. This blog series is a tribute to everyone whom I had a chance of interacting with, during my stay in the city and especially to those who have left behind an indelible mark in my life with their warmth, love and affection. First part of the two-part series. 

The town had been painted yellow, thanks to the “Pulis” on the streets. The “Men-In-Yellow” had thronged the streets of Thrissur in huge numbers. “Pulikali”, an inseparable part of Kerala’s Onam festivities, is a treat to watch, especially when you are in the “Land of Vadukkumnathan” Thrissur, where it is celebrated with so much vigor.It was my first day in Thrissur, and seeing the celebrations around, I couldn’t help but say, “Wow! Now that was an awesome welcome!” It was the September of 2013. Little did I know back then, that it was only the beginning, of one of the most wonderful phases of my life. This is the story of how I came, I saw and fell irrevocably in love with the cultural capital of Kerala – Thrissur.

I have always been a believer of destiny. I believe I was destined to be in Thrissur, as my relocating to Thrissur, was not by choice, but by chance. I was pretty much confident, when I joined my company after my higher studies, that I would get a posting in my hometown itself. However to my surprise, nothing like that happened, and there I was on my way to Thrissur, three months into joining the organization, hopes of being with my family, all shattered by a mail from the H.R department informing me to join the Zonal Office of the company at Thrissur. The hardships of the being a novice at the job, coupled with the feeling of being lonely in a new city, made my initial days in the city worse than my worst nightmare. For the first time in my life, I found myself giving orders to others, many who were more senior to me in age and experience. Honestly, it was the strangest of feelings; I was not sure if I would be making a total fool of myself infront of them by saying something totally stupid, or whether they would snap back at me if I asked them to do something by saying “Who are you to tell me what to do?” I am sure most M.B.A’s who get into a managerial role, straight out of college, could relate to this. There were many times, when I wondered why and for what on earth I left my job as a software engineer with an I.T firm for an M.B.A degree! I used to think, "Writing programs was so much better than managing people; the worst that could happen with a program was that it would throw me an error!". Well, I was to get the answers to my questions shortly; I just had to hang in there, till the time was right. 

Struggling, stumbling, falling (many times) I made it through the rest of the year. And then came year 2014, bringing along with it, the winds of change – recognition and appreciation at work, new friends, new experiences, and lots of memorable moments. 

To be continued..

The 30/31 Way Of Life

Dedicated to all the employed people!

Almost a year back, I happened to watch the trailer of a movie and it had me in splits. The movie was called “Go, Goa, Gone” and the trailer had this very catchy song in it. The best part of the song was it’s lyrics. The song went something like “…Bloody Khooni Monday Tu Aya Khoon Choosne”. The lyricist seemed to have struck the right chord with the ‘office going’ junta (It could very well be the anthem for the lot, had there been one!). I wonder if he had consulted some of his ‘office going’ buddies before penning the lyrics, or had he also been one?  

Monday, for most employees, is the most dreaded day in a week. Everyone has their own reasons, for why they hate Mondays. Many would not have got enough of their weekend, when the alarm goes off on a Monday morning, signaling the start of yet another week at work. For many who had escaped to the comforts of their homes for the weekend, it is the thought of leaving their home and their loved ones behind, and of course, the heavenly home food, which troubles them the most. And when one actually manages to drag their feet into office on a Monday, what awaits us? One of our greatest nemesis, which goes by the name “Weekly Review” – An analysis of what went well the previous week, what did not go very well the previous week, and what needs to be done in the coming week so that everything goes well. (Well, thank God for the movie ‘3 Idiots’ and the ‘All is Well’ mantra, saying that many times during these reviews helps!) Before we know it, the review is over, everyone is back at their workstations, ready to be taken away into a magical world of data created by Microsoft, thanks to the software giant’s Office applications. The phone starts buzzing, calls pour in, you answer some, and you miss some. The mails start popping up, you answer some, forward some, ignore some. Lunch breaks always get postponed; you consider yourself lucky if you get a chance to have lunch on time. Before you know it, it is evening, and you realize, you have hardly struck one or two items off your ‘To-Do’ list. Well, that’s a feeling akin to the one that students get during their exams in school and college days, when the bell rings before the last thirty minutes of the exam, and they realize they have not even finished answering half of the question paper. Some work late into the night and get their backlogs cleared, some leave it for the next day, in the hope that, the next day would be different. It is the same old story the next day – the calls, the e-mails and Microsoft, and the ever-expanding ‘To-Do’ list. We manage to get ourselves through the five days of the week, and we are rewarded with a much needed break in the form of a Saturday and Sunday. Even before we know it, the “Khoony Monday” is back!

Well one might ask, if Mondays are so deadly, work is so tiresome, why do employees work? Why can’t they just call it quits? Well, the answer differs from person to person. Had I been asked the reason why I work, despite of the fact that I dread Mondays, or for that matter any working day in a week, I would say that, to me my job is not just a job, it’s a way of life. I like to call it the “30/31” way of life. My job is what defines me, it is what makes me feel good about myself, it is what gives me the freedom to live life on my own terms, it is what helps me take very good care of my family. I have heard married women say, “I do not need a job, as my husband earns a pretty good salary every month”. I have heard men say, “I quit my job because it was not what I am passionate about. I will find one sooner or later”. Are they right? Maybe yes, but, I like to believe that there is more to a job than the salary you earn or the work you do. A job gives you opportunities to interact with different kinds of people. It helps you learn how to manage relationships, learn how to work together to achieve results, learn how best to react to different situations, learn new skills while developing your existing skills. How often have you found yourself searching for topics to talk about when you meet a friend of yours who is a homemaker or a friend who is not working? Not everyone gets a job that one is passionate about, but is quitting the only way out. The true heroes are the ones who have it in them to do their job with utmost sincerity, even if the job is not of their liking, but at the same time, keep searching for what one is truly passionate about. 

I talked about a lot of things about work, but I saved the best part for the last. The best thing about being employed (no prizes for guessing this) is that last day of the month. I have seen the most morose of the morose people at work too all smiles on this particular day of the month. Money, is an important factor, but it is not the only thing that makes one happy on the 30^th or the 31^st of a month. It brings along with it a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction that can drown away the weariness of all the “Freaking” Fridays and the dreadfulness of all the “Khoony” Mondays of the month. It makes you feel so good about yourself, that you can even shout it out from the rooftops and tell the whole world that you feel good, sorry great! 

As I sign off this blog, the last day of the month is here. I have already made plans to take my parents out for a dinner at our favorite restaurant and then for a walk alongside the backwaters at Marine Drive (love you Cochin for Marine Drive and for the back waters!). The main purpose is to spend quality time with them, but there is also a very selfish intention behind it. It is also my way of silently saying “Sorry” for all the times I told my mother, “Amma, I am busy, I will talk to you later” or my father, “I have told you not to call me during office hours” or “I will call you back” and then forget to call them back due to the work at office. The “30/31” way of life is not without its own set of demerits, you see. However I am sure my parents will understand, because they too have led the “30/31” way of life once. 

Cheers to the last day of the month! Celebrate it with your family and friends and make your favorite day of the month, your family's and friends' favorite too!

Life Is Beautiful

This blog is dedicated to the brave hearts of the Indian Army, the Indian Air Force and the Jammu and Kashmir Police deployed in Jammu and Kashmir, who are working relentlessly to save every one affected by the recent floods in the state, and which is considered to be the worst floods that the state has witnessed in the past sixty years. 

They say that travelling to different places makes you wise; you see new places, meet new people, you learn about the history of the place and about the culture and lifestyles of its people. But I had none of that in mind when I decided to embark on a journey to Jammu and Kashmir, along with my parents. There were only two simple intentions behind it - Firstly, I wanted to gift my parents a trip to the place that Pandit Jawahar Lal Nehru described as 'The Paradise on Earth'. Secondly, I wanted a  much needed break from my work - a respite from the endless flurry of e-mails, calls and meetings that was slowly turning me into a corporate robot. But destiny had different plans for me. What started off as a simple pleasure trip, changed into a journey of a lifetime, as the worst floods that Jammu and Kashmir had seen in many years hit the state, affecting thousands of people in the state, including tourists like me and my family. The lessons that I learnt from my experiences over the past one week in the state are enough to last a lifetime. 

The first lesson - It can happen to anyone

I have read about accidents, natural calamities, man made disasters in the news papers, I have seen it on T.V, and discussed them with friends and family. My heart used to go out to the victims of such incidents, but I had this strange belief in mind that I was immune to such incidents, and that nothing will affect me and my family. Now I realize I was so wrong in thinking so. Disasters can strike anytime, anywhere and no one is immune to it. Who would have thought that a group of people from the southern most state of India, would be affected by a flood in the northernmost state of the country. I had never thought that there would come a time in my life when I would have to face situations like the ones I faced during my stay in Jammu and Kashmir - staying in a disaster relief camp, sleeping in the open air in freezing cold temperatures, standing in a queue for days waiting for a turn to get into a rescue helicopter, running from pillar to post to get an air ticket to go home, and stretching my hands out to someone for food and water. Some things are destined to be and they will happen, no matter what we do to avoid or escape them. 

Yes, From Kashmir to Cape Comorin we all are one

Foolish are those who discriminate between people based on caste, creed, religion and color. It is at times of crisis, that you realize that all creations of the Lord are the same. They may speak different languages, dress differently, may have different cultural backgrounds, but deep down all of them share the same kind of desires, feelings and emotions. I could see the sadness of wives on being separated from their husbands, when the rescue helicopters were taking them away to a safe place, as their husbands were waiving them goodbye from the ground. That longing to be with their husbands, that fear of being separated from their loved ones, will it be any different for a woman from South India and a woman from North India? Their cries, the images of them been dragged into the rescue helicopter after having refused to part with their husbands are vivid in my mind and I am sure it will always stay so until the day I die. The desperation on loosing one's home, will it not be the same for everyone? No one is different when it comes to hunger and thirst as could be seen when people used to crowd around the volunteers distributing water and food in the flood relief camp. There were people from all walks of life in the camp, but everyone's need was the same - to stay alive. No one asked a person's caste or place to which they belonged before helping them. During times of distress, all inequalities vanish and people come together.  

Beauty is skin deep

Fair skin, blue eyes, pretty smile, tall and lean body - these were the features that I used to attribute beauty to, but not any more. I have realized that real beauty is the beauty of one's mind. A mind that is capable of caring for others, empathizing with others, helping others and can think of nothing but the welfare of others, now that is what I call a beautiful mind. I was fortunate to have met many such beautiful people during my trip, be it a young man working at the hotel where we staying telling us tourists, "Aap bilkul mat dariye. Jab tak hum he aapko darne ki koyi zaroorat nahin. Humen kuch ho jaane ke bad hi aapko kuch hoga" (Please do not fear. As long as we are here with you, there is no need to fear. Whatever happens, we will face it first. Its only after something happens to us that you need to fear) or a woman whom I met at the relief camp, a total stranger to me, offering her blanket to me when she found that we did not have a blanket to sleep on, or one of the Keralites in our tour group who looked after the belongings of everyone in the tour group all day long even as some of the people in the group found a way to escape without bothering to help him or his son, or that Captain of Indigo Airlines who went all out of his way to ensure that stranded tourists like us were ensured of a flight back to Delhi. This trip has completely changed my notion of beauty. Beauty is not a pair of blue eyes or fair skin, there is more to beauty than meets the eye. 

The value of something is seldom known until it is lost

Being in a job that requires one to make and receive calls back to back all day long and at the same time respond to e-mails, attend meetings and travel frequently, I used to dread my cell phone. When I got stranded at Srinagar, all telecommunication links were broken and there was no means to contact someone at home to inform them that we were alive. I do not know how may times I would have looked at my cell phone in anticipation that the network would be up again and I would be able to contact someone. I realized the significance of that seemingly simple but powerful device called cell phone during those days. Same was the case with food and water. It is only when I faced a situation where food and water were scarce, that I realized how foolish I was in taking the abundance of food and water at home for granted.  

No profession more noble than Service to the People

When I was stranded in the helipad at Raj Bhavan of Srinagar, there was a time when I felt that I would never be able to make it back to Kerala. We waited for three days for a turn to board the helicopter that airlifts stranded people who manage to reach the helipad by some means and drops them safely at the military airport at Srinagar. "Ladies and kids first", the historical code of conduct during times of distress, was what the Jammu and Kasmir Police and Indian Army had been following in the initial days of the relief operation, for rescuing the flood victims trapped at the helipad. Women who refused to leave their families behind were denied a chance to be rescued as a result of this. Towards the end of the third day of our wait, we had lost all hopes of reaching home, when the Army decided to change the rule and let women and their families too to board the rescue helicopter. So on the morning of the fourth day of our wait at the helipad, we boarded the helicopter that took us to the Srinagar Airport from where we got a flight to Delhi. As our flight landed at the Indira Gandhi International Airport at Delhi, I had only one feeling in my mind - 'Gratitude', gratitude to the Army Officers who got us food and water during our stay at the helipad, who stayed awake all night looking after us and our belongings as we slept peacefully, who worked relentlessly day-in and day-out to make sure that maximum number of people were evacuated from the helipad. I must have thanked the Indian Air Force pilots who flew the rescue helicopters a zillion times for rescuing several people like me and my family stranded at the helipad. And then there was this officer of Jammu and Kashmir Police who helped us get tickets to Delhi, when all airlines refused to give us tickets stating that all seats on the flights were booked; the officer not only got us the tickets, he stayed with us until we completed the check-in. When people used to thank the officers all they said was "You need not thank us, It is our duty to serve the people of the nation and we are just doing that". I have a new-found respect for the men in uniform. They are the real heroes of our nation and their profession is the most noble profession of all. We do not know the names of the officers who rescued us, nor do we know where they are from, but we do know one thing for sure, they will always be there in our prayers, till our last breath. 

Picture Courtesy: india.gov.in 

Last and the most important lesson of it all - "Life is beautiful"

Many a times in my life, I have been angry with God - missing out on the top ranks in school, getting rejected in an interview for that dream job, not being the top performer at work despite of putting all efforts, there are many instances where I have questioned God's ways. Now I realize that what I considered to be major setbacks in life, what I considered to be difficulties in life, were nothing as compared to the plight of millions of people who struggle each day to make ends meet, to stay alive. It is only when you stare death right in your face, you realize the value of life. Money, fame, and accolades are nothing when compared to the value of one's life. It does not matter if you did not top your board exams or did not become the top performer in your office. It does not matter if you could not own an Audi or that water-front apartment that you wished for. It does not matter if you do not look like a George Clooney or a Deepika Padukone. As long as your heart is beating, and you have the means to earn the basic necessities of life 'Roti, Kapda Aur Makaan' (Food, Clothing and Shelter) and you love yourselves and all other living beings around you, you are good and your life is good. It's only when I faced a situation when I feared if I would be alive to see another day, that I realized how beautiful my life was. Life is the most precious gift that God has given us and we must be thankful to God for making Life so beautiful. 

What they say about travelling is true, it does make you wise. My journey to Jammu and Kashmir was one that changed my whole outlook towards life. It was an experience that taught me some of the best lessons in life, however I hope and pray that no one has to ever go through an experience such as the one that me and the other victims of the floods went through. I have now returned home a new person. This is my second life and I have taken a vow that from now on, I will live and treasure each moment as a gift from God. 

Though many people like me have been rescued from Jammu and Kasmir so far, there are many who are still stranded there, struggling for survival. There are many who have lost their lives, many who have lost their families, and many who have lost their house and all their earnings. The Indian Army, Indian Air Force, and Jammu and Kashmir police still continue their rescue operations. A whole nation prays for all those affected and for the bravehearts in uniform. May more lives be saved. May the 'Paradise On Earth' soon recover from the devastation.  

No age too old to live your dream

This blog is inspired by the recently released Malayalam movie "How Old Are You" directed by Rosshan Andrrews and starring actress Manju Warrier in the lead role. For readers who have not yet watched the movie, I'd say, "It's a must-watch".

Recently I happened to watch the malayalam movie "How old are you". The movie tells the story of how Nirupama Rajeev - the protagonist in the story, goes from being a middle-class working woman leading a very ordinary life, to being a change agent in the society. Actress Manju Warrier, who plays Nirupama, has left no stone unturned in making her second innings in movies a sparkling one, by breathing so much life into the character that, from the introduction scene to the end credits to even after you have left the movie hall, the character stays in your mind. 

The story is a very simple one, but the message that it gives is powerful enough to evoke many questions in the viewer's minds, about things that we know and which we have now come to take for granted, but never cared to question. 

I do not mean to generalize, but I feel that most women, have at some point or the other in their lives, sacrificed their dreams or their ambitions for the good of their families. There are many who give up their promising careers to take care of their children, many who give up their dreams for pursuing higher studies to marry that "well-educated, well-settled" guy whom her family has chosen for her, many who leave their favorite places and relocate to new places just to be with their husband. I have often wondered why is it that, most often it is the woman who is expected to give up what is dear to them, who is expected to make all the sacrifices for the sake of the family when men are celebrated as the "head of the family" in most families. They say women are weak, but had they been weak, would they be able to happily give away their dreams for the sake of their dear ones and go on with their lives without complaining? How many men are strong enough to make sacrifices like that?

"Behind every successful man there is a woman" goes the popular adage, and history is rife with stories that support the same. If a woman can offer her support to making someone successful, she can very well do that for herself too. Most often, a woman is so busy scripting the success story of her family members, that she forgets that she too had dreams and aspirations in life. All a woman needs is a word of encouragement, a little consideration for her aspirations. But, when that goes missing, most women choose to give up their faith in their dreams and go on with their lives as it is. However some women, like the protagonist of the movie, decide to make a difference in their lives on their own, by following their dreams. 

As I finished watching the movie, my first instinct was to give a tight hug to my mother who was sitting beside me and tell her how thankful I was to her for all that she had done for me, for our family. I had always taken it for granted that mothers are supposed to do all the household chores, make good food, and take care of of everyone in the family. I felt ashamed and sad that, being a daughter, I had never tried to understand what my mother wanted to do in her life, or what her dreams and ambitions in life were. I am sure that I am not the only one who felt the same way after watching the movie. Thanks to Rosshhan Andrrews, Bobby-Sanjay and the whole team of 'How old are you?' for making this eye-opener of a movie that made us aware of the many "Nirupama Rajeevs" around us, but most importantly, for making us realize that there is no age too old when it comes to living your dreams.



    

What's the best policy?

"What's the best policy?" - Had somebody asked me this question, say some fifteen years back, I would have answered "Honesty" without blinking an eyelid. But that would be way back in the 90's when I was in school. However if I were asked this question today, what would my answer be - would it be the same? Off late, there had been a lot of discussions about appraisals and promotions going on everywhere - in office, in the news, and it got me thinking - Is 'Honesty' still the best policy?

I remember, we had a subject called 'Moral Studies' in our school syllabus. It's during one such 'Moral Studies' class that I first came across this quote on 'Honesty'. The classes were on moral values and every value was explained with the help of a story. That was a time when we hardly knew the importance of what we were being taught, but the stories were powerful enough to drive home the point. Little did we know back then, the world was about to teach us lessons that would contradict with the ones that we were learning.

After years of slogging it out in school and college, and mugging up text book after text book by authors whose names were even more difficult to memorize than the books they wrote, I managed to get an entry into the enticing Corporate world (for some more slogging!). No amount of theory had prepared me for the big bad world that is "Corporate". For the first time I realized that it took much more than good grades in school and college to succeed at workplace. 

From my brief stint in the corporate world, I have learnt some lessons. 

Lesson # 1: Not all colleagues are friends

Ever felt let down by a colleague of yours -  A colleague who steals the credit of an idea that was originally yours and who does not acknowledge it, or someone who asks for a help and does not even say "Thanks" after you have helped them, or gossip-mongers (who are the most vicious of the lot) or that experienced colleague who does not help a new recruit. Not all colleagues are your well-wishers. 

Lesson # 2: Learn how to butter up your boss 

In corporate, most often it is not the deserving person who gets appreciated, but the one who knows how to butter up their bosses (sad, but true). Now this is one art that one needs to master - "How to praise your boss", else there is a very high chance that you might sink into oblivion. 

Lesson # 3: It's all about making the headlines

It is not enough that you do the task that has been assigned to you in the best possible way that you can, you need to shout it out loud from the rooftops and tell the whole world about it! I mean, whatever happened to those good old days when doing your job perfectly was all that mattered! 

Lesson # 4: Never hesitate to say "No"

If you are among those who have difficulty in saying "No" to someone who asks you for a help, then you had it. I have realized over time that unless you learn to say "No", you are never going to enjoy your break or your holiday, you will have powerpoints and excels keeping you company even on holidays.  

Lesson # 5: Honesty 'was' the best policy

And then there are people who make you feel that Honesty has lost its sheen - Employees who sneak out of office early on days when their boss is on leave, employees who do their personal work during office hours, employees who submit false claims (claims that could even put the fake cheques of Frank. W. Abagnale of 'Catch Me If You Can' to shame!), employees for whom work is a mere eyewash for grabbing attention, and then those who put the blame on others to cover up for their bad performance.

Life in corporate has taught me these lessons, but I like to believe that the lessons I learnt in my old 'Moral Studies' classes are still the best. Though some incidents have shaken the foundation laid by those lessons, it has not been able to break it. 

In my corporate stint, I have come across some gem of a personalities too - people who would not give up on their ideals at any cost. "So what" they ask. So what if one does not know how to say "No", So what if one does not know how to flatter their bosses, So what if one does not believe in being dishonest - may be you won't get the promotion that you could have got otherwise, may be you won't be recognized for your work, may be you won't be in the good books of the people who are at the top, but you will have some thing that others who sacrifice honesty for short-term gains will never have - 'peace of mind' and a satisfaction that comes from doing things the right way. 

I have seen dishonest people go places in a short span of time, and I have also seen honest people wait for years to get their due credit despite giving their work their everything. So, if someone asked me today, if I believed that 'Honesty' is the best policy, I would say "Yes", but it will definitely not be an as emphatic "Yes", as it would have been, had I been asked the question some fifteen years back.